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Living with a Narcissist Survival Tips

Narcissistic people can scare anybody. They have the power to manipulate you and break you down to a point until you believe that they’re the only person that can save you.
Narcissists thrive on weakening as many people as they can to get what they desire. The real problem begins when you’re stuck with no way out and your only option is to stay. If you’re living with a narcissist, chances are you’re no longer autonomous, independent, and confident in yourself.

Narcissistic people break down their loved ones, whether it’s a partner, child, spouse, or parent, they must have full control and call the shots. They’re able to destabilize even the strongest person with their “amazing” manipulative and exploitative nature.
Learning to live with someone that scares you because they demand authority and instill fear in you with threats can be quite stressful and tough. There are a few suggestions given by experts, these survival tips have been tried by thousands of people in similar situations.

Study them thoroughly

There’s something powerful about being compliant and meek. Though this might seem like undesirable traits, these are your biggest strengths. By being compliant and meek, you’ll get to see all of their sides. By being compliant, you’ll be able to spot their weakness and discover their behavioral patterns and how they function.

Call them out

If your relationship is valued and trusted by your narcissist and they indeed do know that they’re one, call them out. However, this should be done in a non-sarcastic way and seemingly concerning. If they know they’re a narcissist, they’re most likely proud of it and might even take your comment as caring.

Recognize the cycle of abuse

Though you might not like to admit it, you’re being emotionally and mentally abused by your fellow narcissistic loved one. The narcissistic cycle is as follows:
* Feeling threatened
* Resorting to abuse others
* Becoming and being the victim
* Feeling empowered
Learning how to identify these steps will allow you to stop this cycle from happening

Play a game

Play the game that the narcissist is playing. Though they might ask you questions, they’re rarely ever listening to the answer and will almost always interrupt and talk about themselves. Time them calmly and do the same.

Feed their ego

This might seem counter-productive, but it’s not. By complimenting them you’re disarming their anger and temper little by little each time. This will slowly diminish their rage and you’ll feel a lot more at ease and safe.

Avoid being embarrassed

Be loyal to them in public and stand by them. The one thing they’ll appreciate the most is loyalty, this is especially true when they’re being humiliated. Not only will this make them trust you more, but it’ll allow them to let their guard down.

Look for the good

This is probably a tough one to do, but trying to find the good in a bad situation will allow you to feel much better and calmer. Simple things could make the biggest difference, one good thing to hold onto will allow you to survive a little bit better and longer if you are contemplating separation from this person.

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Have you become a silent partner in your marriage or intimate relationship? In other words, are you reluctant to voice your opinion for fear of criticism? Have you resorted to a why-bother-attitude? 

Do you feel depressed and alone? Are you no longer a confident, optimistic person? Do you devote a lot of time and effort making sure your partner is happy? Do you live in fear of saying or doing something that will “set him off”? If your answer is “yes”, you are more than likely in an abusive relationship.

After more than 30 years, Shirley Wooten Rose is telling her story of partner abuse. She captured in this book the series of trials that she had to overcome to remove herself from this abusive marriage. It is her hope that this memoir will help inform others of the signs and risks associated with intimate partner abuse.

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